Hi Arctra,
Lets first start with tinting, like others have said there is quite a bit of mark up from the bloke around the corner the dealer uses. Yes if you don’t mind paying for it and you can’t wait around then let the dealer do it, but don’t except a $100 difference in normal to darkest tint, it’s all the same price. If you really want to push the point then an offer of $300 for the tint will allow everyone to make money out of you, have a go at your salesman.
Leather protection – if you spray the super duper spray on your seats you will be sealing them yes, but also not allowing them to breathe which will reduce the life of your leather (that equals cracking). Any good aftermarket leather cleaner followed by conditioner twice a year will see your seats looking great and feeling new. Your seats will need cleaning because sweat, dust and spills are a fact of life; the spray is no magic cure.
Paint protection – “She told me that the paint is porus and that VW don't recommend you wax/polish your car as it soaks in to the metal and over time will start cracking the paint.” Wow, that is a nice piece of selling. Have a look in the owner’s manual when you get it and you will see Volkswagen recommend you wax your vehicle every 6 months. I would like to know where the wax can get into the metal in the first place, that is a very poor paint finish which Volkswagen would fix under their warranty anyway.
The dealer’s high quality paint protection for around the $1000 mark is really a $20 bottle of paint sealant applied by machine. Depending on who does the job could make your vehicle look fantastic for the first few washes or wreck your paint work with swirl marks. Most paint protection products need to be reapplied (and I bet you were not told this by her?) at the 12 month period. No matter what you apply to your finish it will wear away with washing and time so keeping it covered with a good quality wax is the best way to go. If you need a paint protection then look up the blokes who do it for a living, they take pride in their job and will advise you on your individual needs, also at a reasonable price.
One you have not said is the carpet treatment they would offer for $300 to protect your carpets and plastic from nuclear fall outs, your can or two of 3M Scotchguard is right on for the money with that one.
Has she said anything yet on pin strips and other decals, for that individual look.

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