An email from Skoda has arrived.
Hailing channels open! All hands on deck!!
Please make welcome the most esteemed Director Customer Experience - VGA*.
Director brings salutations and congratulations!
Well, that’s how the email sounds when I read it in my head.
This wasn’t the email I was expecting - and it seems that life in Orbiting Skoda HQ is upside down compared to ours. I had always placed an Ambassador above a Director.
Running the email through the Universal Translator (the Babel fish in my ear died some time ago) I get the following.
At Skoda we struggle to deliver cars good. Without knowing our customers knees we can’t achieve this.
That first part didn’t sound right so I took a direct look at the email itself. This is harder than it sounds as it’s written in light grey text against a white background. At least it’s on-brand with the Superb paint colour palette. All whites and greys.
At Škoda, we strive to deliver automotive excellence. Without understanding our customers' needs, we can't achieve this.
That’s better! That makes sense.
Director then continues to ask for my response to some questions. There’s a blue underlined link. They got the whole Superb colour palette in the email!
In return for my help he will put me in a draw.
For a fuel card. A random event competition thing. Not really in a draw. What were you thinking?
Luckily I have until the 28th of this month to respond and be drawn. Draw me like one of your French girls.
Here’s hoping the car is delivered before then.
*VGA is, of course, Orbiting Skoda HQ.
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